A Chance Meeting

I wanted to post some thoughts on something that happened to me yesterday and I am afraid if I don't post something, I will forget it, and I don't want to forget it.

Yesterday was a LONG day!  I had a million things to do and I was very tired!  After all my "have-to-do" things were done, I decided to go ahead and go by the fabric store to pick up the stuff I needed to make the pants for the chili-cook off (strange, I know).  Anyway, while I was there I was kind of browsing and wandering, trying to get my thoughts straight and figure out what I was doing.  After a while I picked out my fabric (thanks for the help GiGi) and took it up to the counter to get cut.  While standing in line, a woman came up in the line next to me with a stroller.  Another woman then came up to her and apparently they knew each other, but hadn't seen each other in a while (yes, I was eavesdropping).  The woman with the stroller proceeded to take her baby daughter out for the friend to see.  Such a cute little butterball of a baby dressed in pink!  My turn had come up in line and I was still smiling and gazing at the sweet baby when the girl at the counter broke my trance by saying, "I love babies!"  Waking from my daydream I smiled and said , "Me too."  She then proceeded to cut my fabric and then she said, "I think I may like them too much."  I smiled, not sure how to reply, she then proceeded to tell me that she had just found out that she is pregnant.  I gave her my congratulations with a smile and then her face darkened a bit.  "That's not the whole story, maybe you should hold your congratulations," she said.  She then proceeded to tell me that her and her boyfriend had 6 children already, the oldest 12 and the youngest is just over a year.  She seemed sad and a bit overwhelmed at the thought of another.  I then told her that my husband and I have been trying for two years to have our third child, but apparently He has other plans for us right now.  She smiled halfheartedly and said that she wish she knew God's plan.  I then told her, "Children are a blessing, a gift from our Heavenly Father and no matter what, she would be blessed for loving her children."  She looked at me, handed me my stuff and smiled a bit.  I wished her the best and told her that I hope everything goes well for her.  I stepped away from the counter and that was it. 

I told James about the experience and about her face.  I can't get her face out of my mind, even as I type this, I am overwhelmed.  I wish I had told her more, I wish I knew her name.  I am not one of those people that can talk to anyone, in fact, I avoid people most of the time.  I am determined to return to the fabric store and try to find her.  I want to give her a Mormon.org pass-along card.  I also feel a bit selfish.  I feel like an opportunity for me to meet someone who might want to place their baby up for adoption walked right into my path...did I say the right things?  For some reason, I have this...love? for this woman and I can't get her off my mind.  I pray that she feels Heaven;y Father's love for her.  I pray that she knows that there is a plan for all of us and that it is scary and hard, but totally worth it. 

I don't have experiences like this.  This stuff doesn't happen to me, I come across the same people every week and we exchange the same pleasantries.  Maybe this happened because I asked James what he thinks I should work on personally, maybe some other reason...  I feel blessed to have met her and I pray that I have done and will do what my Heavenly Father wants me to do for this woman.  I feel almost crazy for mulling this whole thing over in my mind over and over again, but her face is there, in my thoughts.  How do we know when we have done our best?  What more can I do for this woman who I don't even know?  I guess we will wait and see.  I need to find some more reasons to go to the fabric store I guess...

Catching Up

I can't believe I have let my blog slip!  I have thought about things to post and things to say, but they never seem to make it onto the computer.  January turned into February faster than I could have imagined.  Now, here I am on a VERY busy Tuesday afternoon and I decide to update this ting!  What am I thinking?  I can honestly say that our life just continues to march forward and not much changes, well, not anything big changes.  Eric is still in Tumbling and loves his new teacher and new class.  Every day he is more and more independent and at times I have to come up with ways to let him think he is in charge, even though I am in control.  I always have to be on my toes with that one.  Alex is doing great in school.  He is making friends and actually playing with them, and not just next to them.  I love his teachers, they are amazingly patient.  Today was Alex's Valentine's Day party at school and I have to pat myself on the back...I did a pretty darn good job keeping it organized and simple.  High five to me!  Now I am home, brownies are baked for tonight's Relief Society meeting, shirt is ironed (because of course I have spots on the shirt I wore today), car is loaded up for T-Ball practice that I have to leave for soon and the kids are having some quiet time so that they can keep on chugging until bed time tonight.  James has been working long hours (as usual) but he is getting off a little early to come to tonight's activity with me. 

James celebrated his 28th birthday!  We didn't do anything spectacular, just time together as a family.  It was nice to be able to have him around for a little time.  He is my everything.  Even though I am not a big fan of Valentine's Day and think it is a bit overrated, he bought me some of my favorite chocolates and a soft blanket and pillow.  He is so sweet and he listens for little clues about what I would like.  He makes me smile constantly and I can't imagine what I did to deserve him.

I am currently working on some new medication.  They are trying to keep my stubborn thyroid in check and it doesn't like it one bit!  I will find out if this medication is working in a few weeks, but I don't feel any different.  I am amazed at how much Heavenly Father has strengthened me.  I still live each day in a low-level pain that flares up daily and somehow, I haven't lost my mind and have been able to deal with it.  Someday, someone might know what is wrong with me, but until then, I will try to stay calm, wear socks, not get too cold, and focus on the positive things in life.  My doctor wants me to get allergy tested, but I don't know if I am up to it yet.  Each new test brings that flicker of hope that something will show up and give us some answers...and every time the hope is squashed by inconclusive results.  I was tested for Lupus and it was negative (thank goodness) so I usually think that I am just crazy :)  I am grateful that James has been able to help me through some of my rough episodes and helped me to stay focused.  The blanket he got my for Valentine's Day is VERY soft and warm...just right when the pain starts to flare up.  Even through all of the health issues I feel extremely blessed and powerful.  I feel that I can achieve almost anything and that no matter what, I will always have my family and my testimony. 

I will be posting more soon.  I love to write and typing this has really helped me express some things right now.  I have really been focusing on my personal relationship with my Heavenly Father and I want to make sure I document some of the changes I feel and the things that have been going on, so I can look back and reflect.  Each day is a new adventure, yet the same old story (hmmm...I like the way that sounds).  Until next time...